Actually, maybe its half an opinion, half a question...
Recently, i kind of noticed that my blog and some others were filled with entries on things that i or other people do that is considered a sin.Stay away from this, it is dosa, stay away from that, do this, do that. Suddenly, there are so many rules and regulations in Islam, that I find myself very confused between what is right and wrong.
Where is the balance between love and fear in Islam. Sometimes, we need to be God-fearing to stay away from sins, but at the same time, we need to show that our religion is simple and teaches us how to love God,and the people around us. These are things that are not easy to do because love and fear are 2 different things, 2 VERY different things.
Things were different when i was younger, what we were taught in school, what i was taught at home, and basically what i picked up along the way, very much differs from what i face now.
1. solat hajat
Since i was small, i was an avid prayer of the solat hajat, a prayer to ask for a specific wish. I have grown up with it all my life, i even read it in most books on how to perform that specific solat. I am sure all of you have done it, whether simply on any day, or maybe for something specific like during your PMR or SPM.
But suddenly, when i came here, i found out that we are not supposed to do it. I was shocked, as was most of my friends who did not know. Why were we taught so many different things, i mean, all the ustazah and ustaz that taught us before, takkan depa tak tau
I have somthing to confess, I used to love performing solat hajat, it was so easy, and i really believed in miracles when i did it. Since solat hajat was a sunnah, (at that time), i would also make effort to perform other prayers beside the usual 5. But when i found out that it was bida`ah, i suddenly lost the feeling of performing other non-obligatory prayers. That is as sad thing to confess, but i feel i have to be honest with myself. I would like to start doing other sunnah things again, but oh dear, confused soul~~~
2. Yaasins on thursday nights.
Asrama students, we are known for our nitty gritty routines from dusk till dawn. I was brought up with reciting the verses from Yaasin every thursday night and it was an obligatory routine in school.
Then when i came here, suddenly, you cant do it. I became even more confused. I know im blundering and i do hope you get my point. The specific word is, i became AFRAID of doing things that i thought were supplementary and was earning my way to heaven. All of a sudden, i had to stop it.
I was not brought up with an extremely grueling background in religion. And there are many more out there, just like me. WE become lost, confused, and in the end, helpless. Yes we try to find more knowledge on what we can do and what we cant do. But how far can we. What are our sources. You ask one friend, and it would be different from the next.For me, a part of me which knew the difference between right and wrong is fading away, wallowed in different opinions.
3. Henna on hand
Everyone who was going to wed had henna on their hands. Nothing was said about it. Then, came the 21st century, and suddenly, it is haram. A friend of mine wrote about this recently in his blog. It intrigued me a lot, and i wanted to write on it myself. But i havent had time to do a particular research on it. Dear friend, if you are reading this, i would like to implore for your help to find more substantial evidence, hopefully from international opinions, and i would also like to add my own two cents to your entry a bit.
As all the things above, when i was younger, i heard all that was of henna can and could be used. As long as it did not stop water from touching the skin. Another thing that made it haram was that it was an ornament on a womens hand, and it could attract the attention of men. hmmm~~
I dont know, i really dont know much about the hukums in Islam. So, i would just pose some questions, hopefully, someone can satisfy them.
If every single accessory could not be worn by women, then what are we supposed to do about it. Rings are accessories, and they can be very attractive, but why arent they haram. Why is the henna on the hand haram then.
** reminder to anyone reading this, these are questions mixed with opinions. except you cant tell which is which because my question mark button is not working.. *_*
4. Dyeing the hair
I always looked disgustedly at people who dye their hair. I always had this thought in my head that people who dyed their hair must be wild rascals. But now, here i am, i dyed my hair, and although i am a bit of a wild rascal, but there was a reason. I had thought dyeing your hair is a big NO-NO, until when i came here, and did some research (for the satisfaction of finding if i can really dye my hair or not, sigh). Anyway, i came across a hadith, that i used to permit me to dye my hair. We always search for things to make it easier for us, we try bending the rules here and there so that we eventually we can do something we couldnt. The question is, is it the right thing to do, bending these rules~
But the fact remains, before this, everyone said to me it was a sin to dye ones hair, and now, all of a sudden, you can.
Sigh~ arent we all mere confused mortals.
** When i ask for an explanation, people would tell me it is Bid`ah. It means that the hadiths these were taken are very weak and the source of it is untrustworthy
But why now....why not before, i dont understand~~
**to end my statements, i just want to say.
~I want to be firm in what i believe in.
~I want to answer swiftly anything anyone asks me about my religion
~But how am i going to achieve that when im not sure of all these things
~Its like stepping over cold water to get to the other side, you want to and you have to, but your always afraid.
** hmm...there are many other hukums in Islam that i am not sure of, but i have to stop blabbering on my blog, because i have some learning issue that i practically mUST FINISH tonight.
**tomorrow my tutorial group is going for a picnic, cant wait!!
**heres a little bit of something on that solat hajat thing, but hrmm,i need opinions~help~